SCARLIEST LOOKS MAIN

The newest creations for #menswear’s Fall/Winter 2014 season have descended on New York City, and as seems to happen every year, it’s turned into a parade of wild getups that nobody would actually wear.

There have been some highlights, like Public School’s continually on-point gear and the introduction of their women’s line, as well as the head banging models of Hood By Air‘s runway.

Far more prevalent, however, is the absurd circus that fashion shows have become. Below are the 18 scariest looks inspired by pedophiles, bond villains, and more. 

The American Psycho

Looks From NYFW 2014

He’s going to be returning some video tapes right after he gets of the catwalk.

The Draco Malfoy

Bill Reid1

Insert Slytherin joke here.

The Puke Pants

Looks From NYFW 2014

This is a womenswear look, right? He looks like my mom in 1990.

The Captain Kirk

Patrik Ervell2

Star Trek was fashionable?

The Bond Villain #1

Kenneth Cole

No. Just no.

The Bath Mat

Looks From NYFW 2014

Pick one up at your local Bed Bath & Beyond.

The Cheek-Bone Nazis

Robert Geller

He can’t get through Airport security with those switchblades on his face.

The Bond Villain #2

Odd2

Complete with the DMX chain and cocaine cheek rouge.

The Rumble-Ready Greaser

Looks From NYFW 2014

 

This guy is taking the model smirk too a whole new level.

The Ghost-Nipple Guy

Siki2

Fashionable nipple slippage.

The L.L. Bean Lesbian

Patrik Ervell1

Patrik Ervell is really gunning for the lesbians-who-love-hiking-in-fleece demographic

The Morpheus 

Siki1

 

Choose whichever pill makes this go away.

The Pants-less Child-Raping Psychopath

HBA1

Hide your kids. Hide your wife. Hide everyone.

The Todd From Wedding Crashers

General Idea

It’s sexual and violent.

The What?

HBA3

 

There are no words for this one.

The Pirate Of Penzance 

Billy Reid 2

 

Is that beard even real? No, it’s not.

The Senile Grandmother

HBA2

Hood By Air is really gunning for the toothless Floridian demographic.

The Everything-That-Was-Wrong-With-The-90s

HBA4

The baggy jeans, the puffy velour jacket, the knockoff Timberlands. It was every terrible ’90s rapper’s uniform. He looks like a member of Naught by Nature.

RELATED: FARMERS & ALIENS: THE WORST LOOKS FROM FW14 COLLECTIONS SO FAR

 

Pedophiles & Bond Villains: The Scariest Looks From NYFW 2014