Date Turn off-Bollywood has completely ruined us and our perceptions of dating and relationships in general. Two perfectly good looking people meet each other, one of them flirts, one of them plays hard to get, the girl gets in trouble, the guy comes to the rescue and saves the day, they fall in love, happily ever after. How amazing would life be if it were like a 90’s romantic movie?
Real life is so much more basic and complicated. Dating! Where do I even start? There’s just so much confusion as to what to wear, what to say, how to say it, what to ask, what to expect and all that never-ending shiz.
If you’re wondering what to do on a date, there are endless lists of things that can be said and done, you can watch a movie together, sit at a cafe, go for some adventure, long drive or just till their bedroom if you’re both into that. Really, get creative, choose whatever ways you express yourself the best. We’re not here to provide you guidelines for what to do.
We are here to tell you just the opposite. What NOT to do on a date if you want to make sure your date goes home without being weirded out by you or judging you wrong. Unless you both genuinely don’t like each other, that is, we are here to make sure that you advance to your second date in no time.
5 Biggest Date Turn Off
1. Be Real
Time to cut the BS. If you’re reading this article at all that means that you’re serious(-ish) about dating and finding the one. If you’re in it for the long haul, then why pretend to be someone you’re not. Many people make this mistake, just because they want to impress their date. Making an impression is not wrong, but you can do that by being you. Everyone has flaws, hiding them is not the answer. Pretending to be rich or poor or from a particular family or your job may impress your date for now but will be very hard to tackle when you both start getting serious and eventually your lies will catch up to you.
So, be yourself, always. Believe that there’s someone out there looking for a partner just like you.
2. Don’t Fake Feelings
Look, if you don’t feel the connection, you just don’t feel it, it is as simple as that. Faking your feelings for someone just to ensure a second date is only going to cost you later. You as well as your date have emotional needs and if they go unfulfilled, neither of you will end up happy. It is always better to be single than to be with someone you don’t understand or who don’t understand you.
3. Leave Room For Curiosity
The curiosity is real. Especially if they made an excellent first impression on you. But keep yourself from bombarding them with questions like you’re sitting at a police interrogation or job interview. Plus, too many personal issues may leave them feeling like you’re imposing, which is a massive turnoff for so many people. Understand that you can’t just find out everything about them on the first date itself (even if you can, you shouldn’t). Instead, leave some room for curiosity and mystery to give you and them something to look forward to. All you have to know right now is what kind of a human being they are and how they respond to their environment and their general perspective on life. Here Are 5 Reasons That Defines The Reason People Cannot Find Love
4. Not Listening
Okay, so this is a MAJOR problem ladies have with most (not all) men they go out with. However, women too are guilty of this. There are two of you on the date; there’s supposed to be a dialogue, not a monologue. If all you’re concerned with is getting your stories, your opinion, your views out without listening to what they have to tell about themselves, your chances of going out again are very close to nada.
5. Get A Hold Of Yourself
That day doesn’t come very often when you get to go out on a date with someone you already like a lot, but when it does, it’s nothing less than a fairy-tale feeling. But, my friend, you have got to control those overflowing emotions. Make them feel that you like them, but overdoing those compliments and caring too much and then complementing them again as if you’re in love may put them in a very uncomfortable and awkward place. The first date is your platform to express yourself, get to know them as well and make an excellent first impression.
6. Never Forget Etiquette
Dear men, listen up! No woman has ever been able to resist a gentleman, ever! And ladies too, don’t expect all the nice things from him alone, you need to do something for him too. Bring him a gift, maybe and split the bill at the very least.
7. Express Yourself
There’s many things that you may want to tell and some things you may not be comfortable talking about. You are strangers after all. Express yourself freely, leave nothing to chance when it comes to impressing your date. If you’re not satisfied with talking about certain things, tell them. If he or she is a nice person, they will understand.
8. Watch Your Hands
Brushing your fingers against their skin a little while playful flirting is okay, considering your partner is fine with that. But be mindful while making physical contact. You don’t want to appear perverse and drive them away, which may not be your intention.
9. Draw The Line
There’s such an urge to call your date enjoying a nice evening together. But you must draw the line as to how many times you should and shouldn’t call. Don’t be a nagging partner. Give them some space or they may start to get annoyed.
10. It’s Not “Just One Date”
Don’t limit yourself to just one evening out. Invite them to spend time with your family or friends to get them to know you and where you come from, much better. This way they will understand and evaluate if you are their cup of tea or not and even have a ton of fun too.
11. Plan And Execute
Whenever wish to plan a surprise, think before you act. Especially if you’re planning to show up in front of your date’s house in the middle of the night or something, s/he shouldn’t run into a corner because her/his parents don’t know about you yet. Keep things simple, if your execution is a bit out.
12. Keep It Pocket-Friendly
Spending too much can cost you in the long run as well. Don’t run your pockets dry just to impress her, that’s what your personality is for. When you rely too much on expensive gifts and restaurants, it tells that you having nothing else to show for yourself, and may attract gold-digger.
13. Sloppy Dressing
Expressing yourself is not just about talking. Your clothes represent you, especially during the time when first impressions are how you judge the other person. When you put the effort in your dressing, it shows how sincere you are about the date and how much he/she matters to you. So, get your best suit and your high heels, guys.
14. Keep Your Expectations Low
Expecting too much will only sabotage your chances of a nice evening. Go with low expectations and enjoy the company of your beau instead of going in with unrealistic expectations just to set yourself up for disappointment.
15. Don’t Double Date
It’s okay to go for a fun evening with friends and family along with your date. You get connected with your loved ones and bond with your beau and have fun in the process, so win-win for all. But NEVER go for a double-date. It only makes you compare your relationship with the other couple, which is never a good idea. Every relationship has its flaws and good parts, but they’re better left isolated and not compared to others’ for everyone to be happy.